Between The Covers

Jenn Cohen | May 1, 2012 | 0 Comments

It Takes More Courage to Live Than to Die

by Torch

The news love to splash a story of celebrity suicide or “accidental” death. The latest being Whitney Houston, who joined a long list including Heath Ledger, Amy Winehouse, Kurt Cobain, Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, Jim Morrison and so on. These tragedies leave fans wondering why; why didn’t they find help? Why didn’t they talk to someone? Why did they check out of the party when they were so successful? How could they be so unhappy when nothing should be wrong?

The truth is that you never know what is happening in another person’s mind, heart, and soul. The person standing in front of you talking, smiling, and seemingly fine could be simultaneously feeling completely suicidal. If you are that person, you are not alone. You may know someone who is self-medicating with drugs, food, alcohol, cutting, and yes even sex. Sometimes, well most of the time, the hurt runs deep and professional help is needed to get “clean” or “clear.”

When we think of a celebrity surrounded by family, friends, agents, and staff, we wonder, Why didn’t somebody do something? Didn’t anyone notice? Were they afraid to say something? If you know your friend or family member is struggling, talk to them, find some solutions, and get help. Are you standing by, afraid to offend someone who is displaying dangerous behavior? We are all in this ride of life together. If you are hurting, talk to someone who is healthy for you and can help; depression and addiction can own your soul if you don’t fight for your life.

It would be easy if mental health issues were socially acceptable; if you could shake hands and say “Hi, I am Michelle, chronically depressed.” “Nice to meet you Michelle, I am Darren, Bi-Polar, and this is my friend Lara, alcoholic…” Instead, we all twist and turn ourselves trying to hide the problems and issues that led to the diagnosis. We hide and lie, mostly to ourselves, until we implode. Risking going into treatment is far more courageous than giving up.

You hear all the platitudes like, ‘Make time for your friends and family.’ The truth is, that it works. Take the scary road towards radical honesty because most of the time we all need some help. Change is hard, healing takes time, but saving the life of someone you care about is worth the pain. How many times of risking death did it take for someone to accidentally overdose, to take that fatal cocktail of drugs and alcohol? How many times did that person wake up disappointed to still be alive?

Then there is the toss up of how much pain would you cause family and friends in ratio to your own pain of continuing on? What is your next step; trying to survive, or trying to find a way to end your life and make it look like an accident for either insurance purposes, or to lessen the guilt of those you leave behind? The guilt of wondering, “If I had known, maybe I could have helped.” Millions of fans think that of someone famous, if they had known that person, or been their manager they would have done something.

The point being, you can do something–ask for help, or be the help. When a life is on the line, how far would you go to save it, even if it is your own?

Dedicated to:

High school best friend Carla- alcoholic, drown in her hot tub- survived by twin daughters and her husband and family.

Cousin Robert- Chronic depression, fatal gunshot wound to the head.